


Lucky Enough To Call His Own

by RuddiestBubbles



Category: MindCrack RPF
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-02-05
Updated: 2016-02-05
Packaged: 2018-05-18 10:27:56
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,765
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5925103
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/RuddiestBubbles/pseuds/RuddiestBubbles
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>It started as a simple stream co-lab, but it went so much farther than that at Pax.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Lucky Enough To Call His Own

Kurt made his way to his hotel room. He fished the key card out of his pocket and unlocked the door. He closed the door gently behind him as he wandered into the small room. The 'crack house', as they jokingly called it, had been canceled at the last minute, causing them all to have to get a hotel rooms last minute. But to Kurt's pleasure, his room, like many of the others, was on the top floor, which meant easy access to the roof.

Kurt pulled on a jacket and climbed out onto the fire escape, using the ladder to get onto the roof itself. It was oddly calm, especially with the bustling city glowing far below him. But, the sky was clear and the stars shined brightly. He laid down on the roof ground, looking up into the night sky. 

The rest of the Mindcrackers and other Youtubers were at a nearby bar, some surly getting wasted while others sat by, drinking water, making sure their friends got back safely. Kurt had decided to forgo drinking. As much as a glass of scotch sounded wonderful, the crowds didn't. The Pax weekend was almost over, which was relieving and saddening. He wanted to get away from the crowds and the anxiety it brought him, but he wasn't quite ready to be away from his friends yet. He may be an introvert, but that didn't mean he hated being around people in general. He had grown oddly close to this group of friends. 

He pushed all those thoughts aside, looking back up at the night sky. The stars shined brightly and he could just barely make out mars. This would usually have him entranced, would usually have him distracted, but his mind was elsewhere. He hadn't been able to keep this person out of his thoughts. She was like a star shining brightly in a night sky. He sighed deeply, putting his arm over his eyes. How had it all started, this attraction?

He had meet her at a previous Pax, almost a year ago. They had been trying to figure that out a few weeks ago when they had done a, spur of the moment, co-op live stream. They had been playing UHC on the PlayMindcrack server. It had started so awkwardly, him having made a, really dumb in his opinion, joke. But she had almost fallen out of her chair from laughing. That laugh, it was honestly one of the best things he'd ever heard. It had made him smile brightly and laugh along with her. He may have even blushed slightly, which had made him thankful for not using his 'beard cam' that day.

He hadn't even noticed these new feelings until they met at Pax just a few days ago. They had shared an, only slightly, awkward hug. Which, if he were to be honest, he hadn't wanted it to end, not just because she smelled simply amazing, a sweet mix of vanilla and cinnamon, but that his heart fluttered and hugging her felt so right. They had hung around each other a bit, occasionally teasing and joking with each other. But, his duties as a Mindcracker pulled him away from spending any time with her, which saddened him greatly. 

But, the real question, that he constantly pondered, was why? Why was he so attracted to this girl that he barely knew, but felt oddly close to?He had never really liked anyone before. It was weird, having these foreign feelings. His heart fluttered whenever they touched and butterflies fluttered in his stomach. And, that's not even mentioning how beautiful she is. Just imagining her makes his face heat up. 

"Crowds getting to ya?" Came a soft voice that made Kurt's heart race.

He moved his arm, seeing the girl who was constantly on his mind, casually standing near him, glancing at him with a small smile. "You don't even know the half of it." Kurt says with a small smile of his own. 

"You don't mind my company, do you?" 

Kurt shook his head. "Not at all." 

She sat down beside him, sitting closer than he thought she would. 

"I'm surprised your not at the bar with everyone else." Kurt says, glancing sidelong at her. He was surprised by that, but he wasn't gonna complain about the company, he rather enjoyed it. 

"Just didn't feel like going out tonight I guess." MK says with a sad smile. 

"You ok?" 

"Ah, yeah I'm fine, just not wanting the weekend to end just yet." 

"These weekends just never seem long enough, do they?" 

"No, they never are." 

A silence settled between them, though it wasn't at all awkward. Kurt glanced back up at the night sky, seeing the stars that shined ever so brightly. One stood out, the North Star, which was the brightest, and definitely reminded him of someone, particularly the girl beside him. He heard, and saw, the girl shiver beside him. He sat up, unzipping his jacket and handing it to MK. 

"You don't have to... I'm fine." MK says.

Kurt simply smiles. "Your shivering, and I insist."

"Thanks." MK says with a sheepish smile.

"Anyway." MK starts. "What are you really doing up here?" 

"It's quiet, makes for a good place to think." Kurt says, hoping she didn't question him too much. "Plus the view is pretty spectacular." He adds quietly, briefly glancing up at the night sky, not wanting MK to know he wasn't talking about the night sky. 

"It is pretty great." MK says, glancing up, the night sky reflecting off of her brown eyes. 

She truly didn't know how much Kurt liked her. He didn't even truly know. But, what he did know, he really the girl sitting beside him, and he'd give anything to know what kissing her was like. He'd even just settle for a tight hug. But, he knew he'd die of embarrassment if he even brought it up. Plus, how could anyone like him? It's not like he was anything special by any means. 

"Indeed." Kurt says, a small smile tugging at his lips. 

MK smiled, a gentle look in her brown eyes. "How's life?" 

"Life is pretty good, can't really complain." He says, his smile growing at the simple question. "you?" 

"Can't complain either. It's pretty good." 

After a moment of silence, MK brings up another topic. 

"Anyone special in your life?" She questioned with a raised eyebrow. 

"Ha." Kurt joked. "That's like asking if I like being the center of attention." 

"No one at all?" 

"No, I'm just too awkward for something like that, as sad as it sounds." 

"I don't think your all that awkward." She says gently, placing a hand on his knee. 

His heart skipped a beat and he was quite thankful he didn't shudder, for that would surely give away his feelings, which he wasn't ready for, as much as his heart ached to tell her, he just wasn't ready. But, that thought made him sad, which she must have noticed the slightest change in his demeanor.

"What's wrong?" She questions, a worried expression on her face. 

"It's uh... nothing." He replies, glancing down at his hands, unable to meet the others gaze. 

"You know you can talk to me Kurt." Comes the soft reply. 

"I know.... it's just awkward." 

She laughs quietly. "Can't be that awkward." 

Kurt takes a deep breath. "I really like someone...." He admits quietly. 

"Oh?" She says, encouraging him to continue.

"I've never liked anyone before..... and I have no idea what to do." 

"You've never liked anyone before?" She questions, catching his gaze briefly.

"Is it really that surprising?" 

"Yes, because your a wonderful person who deserves love." 

He really couldn't look at her. She was saying all these things about him, stuff he didn't think to be true. How she saw it, he didn't know, but he wasn't gonna question the beautiful girl.

"Sure." He replies sadly. 

"Hey, Kurt, come on." She says gently.

"I'm sorry MK. I really shouldn't be burdening you with my silly problems." 

"Love is no silly matter, and your not burdening me, I enjoy talking to you and spending time with you." 

He lets his gaze briefly flicker to MK, seeing the gentle, caring look that didn't just show on her face, but reached her beautiful brown eyes. But, he just couldn't bring himself to say anything. 

MK sighed quietly. "Kurt, please just listen to me." She practically begged. 

Kurt looked up at her, finally letting their gazes meet, and didn't look away, even though he wanted nothing more than to go back to his room and cry. 

"I know your insecure, and I know you've always had trouble holding yourself highly. But, your a great person. Your kind, your funny, your one of the most selfless people I've ever met. I know you don't see that, but everyone else does. And, whoever is lucky enough for you to like them can obviously see it too." 

He sighs, wanting to believe every single word she said, but he just didn't know if he did, or could. "I don't even know if they like me back." 

"Whoever it is, I'm positive they do." She says, something new in her eyes. Maybe jealousy?

"I want to believe you." He starts sadly, his voice quiet. "But I just don't know if I can..... or do."

"Why don't you believe anyone could like you?" She asks gently. 

She had already seen so much of his insecure side, too much of it even, but it's not like he didn't trust her.

"Because I don't see myself as a likable person. I just don't see why or how I could even deserve love from anyone."

"Don't deserve love?" 

"How could someone so insecure, so quiet, so shy, deserve love from anyone? I just can't imagine anyone loving me." 

She took a deep breath. "I know that's how you see things, but not everything you think is absolutely true."

"You don't know how I feel." 

"But I do Kurt. When I was younger, I used to see myself as worthless and dumb. But I learned to see past that. I learned to see you I really was." 

"At least you can get over it. I won't ever, it seems hopeless." He says, feeling the tears already stinging his eyes and he just willed them to go away, to not fall, to not make him looker weaker, which he knew wasn't really possible. 

MK pulled her phone out, bringing up the camera and pointing it at them, moving closer in the process. "What do you see?" She asks gently. 

"I don't know.... myself I guess..." He replies confused. 

"No, I mean, really what do you see?" 

"A weak person who deserves no one." He says sadly.

"You wanna know what I see?"

He just shrugs. 

"I see a person who's strong enough to actually talk about his feelings and face his insecurities. I see a sensible man who doesn't want attention, but wants nothing more than to help everyone else. I see someone who doesn't give themselves enough credit." 

Maybe she was right. Maybe he didn't give himself enough credit. Maybe he just needed someone to point it out or him to see it.

"Your right..." He admits quietly. "I don't give myself enough credit.

She gives him a gentle smile, sitting her phone beside her. "It's always great to see the good in yourself, even if it takes some help to find it." 

He looked up, letting their eyes meet. He did see the good in himself, but only because she showed him. But, now he just couldn't see her ever liking him, not in the way he wanted anyway. She just seemed like too good of a friend for her to actually like him, or even love him eventually. He had already admitted so much to her, how could admiring that he liked her be any worse than anything he'd already said. 

"MK...." Kurt starts awkwardly. "I uh...." He tries, but his voice trails off towards the end, unable to say what he actually wanted. 

"Hmm?" 

"Uh... thank you." He says, inwardly sighing at his inability to express his feelings. 

She smiles gently. "Your welcome, but I don't think that's actually what you really wanted to say." 

Kurt sighs deeply. She placed a hand on his knee again, meeting his gaze. 

"Whatever it is, I'm listening, and I won't judge." 

"MK.... I really like you." He says nervously.

A surprised look settles on her face and that made his heart drop and the tears that had glistened in his eyes spill onto his cheeks. He knew she could never like him. He knew he was dumb for even having the thought that he had a chance with her. She was way out of his league and deserved so much better than him. He squeezed his eyes shut, hoping to block out the world, hoping that everything would just go away and his embarrassment would disappear. 

A thumb wiping away a tear had his eyes shooting open. He saw the gentle smile, and the gentle look in MK's eyes. 

"Kurt." She starts gently, brushing away tears that continued to fall. "Why didn't you tell me you liked me?" 

"I didn't believe I deserved you.... I still don't." 

"Of course you deserve me, anyone be lucky to have you." 

He just looked at her, trying desperately to read her, though he was failing epically. 

"I like you Kurt, I have for a while." 

"You-you do?" He asks, surprised and unsure. 

"Yes, I do, and I'm glad you told me."

Kurt honestly wasn't sure what to say, or how to feel. He wanted to be happy, but he felt like it was all a dream and he wasn't actually having the possibility of having the one he cared most about.

"Need a hug?" Came MK's voice, breaking Kurt from his thoughts. 

He nodded mutely and accepted the hug. He buried his face in her hair, almost instantly becoming overwhelmed by the vanilla, cinnamon smell, which was intoxicating and oh so delicious. They stayed like that, for the longest time, their arms wrapped tightly around each other, both never wanting to let go. 

"Are-are we together now?" Kurt asks quietly, his voice slightly muffled by MK's hair. 

He felt her shift slightly, as if getting more comfortable. "If that's what you want, then I'm willing to be together." 

"It's all I want." He says quietly. 

"It's all I want too." She breaths out. 

After a long, long while, they finally move away from each other, only because they both started shivering as the temperature continued to drop. They headed back down the ladder and into Kurt's room. He still couldn't believe he could call MK his, it was so surreal. 

"You know, we really are MKtheMac now." She teases gently. 

"I guess we are." He agrees, a smile tugging at his lips as he brushed some brown hair out of her face, tucking it behind her ear. 

Both of their eyes fluttered shut as they both leaned in. He kissed her gently, his fingers in her hair and her hands on the small of his back. It was magical and amazing and so much better than he ever thought it would be. He never wanted to pull away, but eventually he did. His cheeks were flushed red, but the light feeling in his heart made everything seem better. She was a shining star in his world, one that would always guide him home, that's how he liked to think about it.

"I better get going." MK says sadly. 

"I know." Kurt replies softly.

"Do you want your jacket back?"

"You can keep it with you, it's not like I won't see you again."

She smiled. "I was hoping you would say that. It smells like you, and I like that... a lot." 

He caressed her cheek, stroking it gently with the pad of his thumb. "How is this even gonna work?" 

"It'll be tough, but we'll make it work." She replies, a hopeful expression on her face. 

"I hope so."

"Me too." 

"Goodnight MK." 

"Goodnight Kurt." 

They share another kiss, this one just as magical as the first. She pulled away eventually and left with a wave. Somehow, just somehow he knew they'd work. He knew they'd make it work. He moved to sit by the window, looking out at the stars, looking specifically for one, the brightest one, which reminded him of MK, who he was somehow lucky enough to call his.


End file.
